Wednesday, May 15
Azra's off for over seven months!
The house is extra quiet and empty tonight as I dropped Azra off at the airport this afternoon. She will arrive in Sarajevo tomorrow for the summer - and then for the fall semester she'll be studying abroad at Freie University in Berlin. So she won't be back until mid-December. So we are on our own for seven and a half months!
Thursday, May 9
Major Setback
Unfortunately, I just cancelled my trip to Brno for next month and have postponed the Frozen Embryo Transfer for at least half a year, probably.
I had a follow-up blood test earlier this week to re-check my CA-125 levels. This was the test I had in March when we learned that implantation hadn't been successful after the embryo transfer. In March my CA-125 level was 44.2, and after six weeks of hormone therapy, it was 40.8. My Charlotte doctor, Dr. Taeff, said that she would not recommend an embryo transfer to anyone with CA-125 levels over 30. Why no one suggested I have this 2-second blood test previously I don't know.
Apparently CA-125 is a possible indicator of endometriosis - which means growth of uterine tissue outside the uterus, usually in the pelvic cavity or in/on the fallopian tubes and ovaries. The only way to really know is visually, which means by having laproscopic surgery and looking. And apparently, endometriosis can cause fertility problems, particularly implantation problems, for chemical not mechanical reasons. The uterine lining is itself fine physically, but the other growths elsewhere give off hormones that confuse the uterine lining and can cause it to reject the embryo's "requests" to implant. Or at least that is my understanding based on reading about it online. There are other connections between endometriosis and fertility, but this is the one I think Dr. Taeff is focused on.
So basically we don't really know for sure that I even have endometriosis, but I might, and we don't really know whether it is causing implantation problems for me, but it might. So even though there are a lot of maybes in that sentence, I would never stop second guessing myself if I went ahead with the embryo transfer in a couple weeks and it didn't work again. Its just such an emotional and financial investment, and we only have four embryos, I really have to take every step to optimize my chances of sucess.
So I've cancelled the trip and the transfer. My flight ticket was non-refundable, but fortunately Luftansa has a medical condition clause that allowed me to keep the money as a credit for a future ticket instead. So that is good.
I made an appointment to talk to Dr. Taeff about next steps regarding confirming and treating the possible endometriosis; however, her first available consultation slot isn't until June 3, so it may be awhile before I even know what happens next. I did leave a message on for her nursing team so I may get squeezed in if there is a cancellation or they may go ahead and prescribe more hormones in the meantime.
Obviously I'm not very happy about this setback. I was already discouraged after March's failure, and was not particularly positive about my odds in June, but now the indefinite postponing of the next step is very frustrating. I just want to know if and when. This inability to plan my life is really hard for me. And of course every development seems to suggest it is less and less likely this is ever going to work, which is depressing
I had a follow-up blood test earlier this week to re-check my CA-125 levels. This was the test I had in March when we learned that implantation hadn't been successful after the embryo transfer. In March my CA-125 level was 44.2, and after six weeks of hormone therapy, it was 40.8. My Charlotte doctor, Dr. Taeff, said that she would not recommend an embryo transfer to anyone with CA-125 levels over 30. Why no one suggested I have this 2-second blood test previously I don't know.
Apparently CA-125 is a possible indicator of endometriosis - which means growth of uterine tissue outside the uterus, usually in the pelvic cavity or in/on the fallopian tubes and ovaries. The only way to really know is visually, which means by having laproscopic surgery and looking. And apparently, endometriosis can cause fertility problems, particularly implantation problems, for chemical not mechanical reasons. The uterine lining is itself fine physically, but the other growths elsewhere give off hormones that confuse the uterine lining and can cause it to reject the embryo's "requests" to implant. Or at least that is my understanding based on reading about it online. There are other connections between endometriosis and fertility, but this is the one I think Dr. Taeff is focused on.
So basically we don't really know for sure that I even have endometriosis, but I might, and we don't really know whether it is causing implantation problems for me, but it might. So even though there are a lot of maybes in that sentence, I would never stop second guessing myself if I went ahead with the embryo transfer in a couple weeks and it didn't work again. Its just such an emotional and financial investment, and we only have four embryos, I really have to take every step to optimize my chances of sucess.
So I've cancelled the trip and the transfer. My flight ticket was non-refundable, but fortunately Luftansa has a medical condition clause that allowed me to keep the money as a credit for a future ticket instead. So that is good.
I made an appointment to talk to Dr. Taeff about next steps regarding confirming and treating the possible endometriosis; however, her first available consultation slot isn't until June 3, so it may be awhile before I even know what happens next. I did leave a message on for her nursing team so I may get squeezed in if there is a cancellation or they may go ahead and prescribe more hormones in the meantime.
Obviously I'm not very happy about this setback. I was already discouraged after March's failure, and was not particularly positive about my odds in June, but now the indefinite postponing of the next step is very frustrating. I just want to know if and when. This inability to plan my life is really hard for me. And of course every development seems to suggest it is less and less likely this is ever going to work, which is depressing
Tuesday, April 30
Tenure!
I finally got my official letter from the Chancellor yesterday acknowledging that as of July 1st I will be promoted to the Rank of Associate Professor with Tenure!
Yay! I've been checking my mailbox five times a day for the past two weeks, so when the letter finally came I was a little disappointed that it wasn't more exciting, especially as I knew what it was going to say. But nonetheless its exciting to keep my job!
Yay! I've been checking my mailbox five times a day for the past two weeks, so when the letter finally came I was a little disappointed that it wasn't more exciting, especially as I knew what it was going to say. But nonetheless its exciting to keep my job!
Friday, April 19
Maggie and Ingrid's 5th Birthday!
A few hours ago I got back from a quick, two-night trip to Staunton to celebrate Maggie and Ingrid's fifth birthday.
It was an action packed day that started with a party at their Montessori, continued with piles of presents and cake when they got home from school, then an afternoon of playing with new toys - from barns to easels to fairy wings - and ended with a t-ball scrimmage game.
I was pleased that the girls were as excited about the cowboy boots I got them as I was, but unfortunately Maggie's were too tight and I had to take them back to exchange for a bigger size.
It was an action packed day that started with a party at their Montessori, continued with piles of presents and cake when they got home from school, then an afternoon of playing with new toys - from barns to easels to fairy wings - and ended with a t-ball scrimmage game.
I was pleased that the girls were as excited about the cowboy boots I got them as I was, but unfortunately Maggie's were too tight and I had to take them back to exchange for a bigger size.
Thursday, April 11
June 7th = Frozen Embryo Transfer
Plans are set for my return to Brno. I will have a frozen embryo transfer (FET) on Friday, June 7th. I bought a plane ticket to Prague and arrive the day before and leave the following Monday.
Unfortunately the cute hotel with kitchen we stayed in is totally full that week, but I have reserved a room at the other place we stayed on the first night last time. It was also fine and actually a little closer to the clinic so that is good. I won't rent a car this time, but I found a very reasonable bus directly from the Prague airport to Brno. It takes longer but is simple and cheap.
It feels good to be moving forward on the next attempt. Lets hope this one works.
Unfortunately the cute hotel with kitchen we stayed in is totally full that week, but I have reserved a room at the other place we stayed on the first night last time. It was also fine and actually a little closer to the clinic so that is good. I won't rent a car this time, but I found a very reasonable bus directly from the Prague airport to Brno. It takes longer but is simple and cheap.
It feels good to be moving forward on the next attempt. Lets hope this one works.
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